Who’s reading anyway?

04/15/2010

Hi all,

(or not)

I am emailing this post in and not categorizing it, because, —-

categorizing seems to be such a tedeous task for 0 readers and 0 responders.

There has been quite a bit that is going on and I would like to share all, but I know one important fact:

There is no one to read these things.

I am baffled. People read seemingly boring blogs containing every possible imaginable thing and they respond when someone says: “my dog did his business on the floor” or “I Went to McDonalds for a BK Broiler (mismatch on purpose),” or “I retiled my bathroom today.” but no one (except for my most wonderful and faithful computer Guy who reads my blog as a way of A. understanding me further (and) B. supporting my blogging efforts) cares to read/respond.

Why does this bother me so much? Well, Sure, blogging is a way to get one’s thoughts, journey, feelings, etc out to share to the world. I am not an egoist who just has to be heard. But, I do enjoy dialog. I like the fact that I can share with likeminded people and they can share with me. I revel in the fact that the communication and a bit of relationships that I can’t find in proximity, I can find on the internet. One of the only redeeming qualities about Elaf Shafaq’s “The Bastard of Istanbul,” was her description of the Coffee house in Turkey where a group of people would congregate to discuss issues and be a part of each others’ lives.

Now, I admit that I read quite a few blogs. Some of the blogs are from people who are either in my particular situation or discuss it in great detail: that is: an intercultural or interracial relationship. Some of the blogs are written by other blind people. Whenever I visit a blog, I try dilligently to leave a thoughtful or encouraging comment. When people leave me a comment on facebook, I try always to respond. I must thank:

Jim from

jvedes of Arabia

and Haben

from Haben’s travel Blog. who have actually responded to my comments. They are the only responders. Even those who vehemently disagree with posts and pick apart the poster get some dialog in response to their comments. I seem to generate a tepid “nothing.” sometimes, I think that I have found likeminded bloggers, people who might understand what I am going through in my relationship, people whom I can support and they me in our struggles and celebrate together in our joys. I try and understand their experience. I try reading through their blog from beginning to end. I respond thoughtfully. I get no response. And, no comments on my blog because they don’t read it.

I am not one of those bloggers who just wants to be heard. I thought that by sharing my experience, I could elicit comments from others who have either experienced what I have and can give some encouragement/support or from those who will experience some of these things and I have given them things to think about. In short, I began this blog 1. yes, to help me sort out and write down my feelings – but 2. as a way/means of communication.

Yet, this has not happened. And the disappointment rises. That is all I will say. I believe that the experience imparted by others is better than a novel and is the best story told. Yet, my feelings of disconnectedness, misunderstanding, being marginalized and perceived as either strange, unintelligent, or unworthy of discussion seems to rein in both spheres of communication. If it weren’t for my “Computer Guy,” who, by the way, is a great listener and I am not just saying that because there is a chance that he will be reading this after he has heard me whine about no blog visitors: I’d be talking to my computer. And, although I want my computer to talk to me, when I begin to rely on it to listen as well, then I have quite a problem. So much for feeling as part of a community! That has gone by the trash bin.

Check out my written articles and comment at:
http://www.associatedcontent.com/user/487125/jan_wright.html
“Bonds of the Heart should never be broken!”
“Dil kay rishton kay bandhan kabhi naheen tootnay chahiay hain!” — Urdu translation

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One Response to “Who’s reading anyway?”

  1. Anilu Says:

    Hey Jamily,
    I am reading you now. I hardly comment in many blogs because I am lazy to write and since English is not my first language, I find it hard to make my point understood.
    I am also in an intercultural relationship since I am Mexican and hubby is Indian. I am not caucasian so I am not gori and still don’t know if I’m western or not.
    Anyway, post more often and you will get more traffic.
    I had a blog but have left it for a long time.
    Take care,

    A

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